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Harlan Dexter
Harlan Dexter is the main antagonist of the 2005 comedy movie Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. A retired actor now making a living as a businessman and Hollywood socialite, he at first seems to be nothing more than the host of a lurid party attended by protagonists Harry and Harmony. However, it soon becomes clear that he's the center of a sordid conspiracy that may involve Harmony's recently-deceased sister... He was played by Corbin Bernsen, who also played Vulcan in American Gods. Personality Harlan Dexter is careful to maintain a respectable exterior while in public: he hosts parties for the stars, owns a prestigious mental health clinic, reconciles with his daughter after years of estrangement, and does his best to appear amiable while in conversation with Harry and Perry. Behind the scenes, Harlan is a greedy, exploitative criminal who was all too happy to steal his daughter's inheritance and subject her to months of imprisonment to avoid the consequences of his actions. Ruthless in the extreme, he also goes so far as to eliminate anyone who might know of his activities, even his lover, and allows for the torture of witnesses via gonad electrocution in order to track down anyone who might know his dirty little secret. In his darkest moments, he still appears mockingly affable, chatting snarkily with Harry and Perry while holding them at gunpoint - even congratulating Harry on his slight-of-hand skills. However, the affability doesn't hold up in the face of his bad mood, as he can be heard irritably snarling "let's burn the bitch" when finally getting his opportunity to cremate Veronica. Also, he's known to have publicly called Veronica a cunt during a heated argument. It's heavily implied that Harlan has a closeted incestuous streak: though it's not known if he made any moves against Veronica in the past, he is revealed to have carried on an affair with Mia Frye while she was still impersonating his daughter. History Prior To The Film Twenty years prior to the start of the film, Harlan Dexter was a highly successful actor, most commonly appearing as the lead in Hollywood blockbusters. A fan of the classic Johnny Gossamer mystery novels, he not only collected the entire series, but also went so far as the star in the film adaptation as the title character. The production took place in a small southern Indiana town, and it was here that Dexter was first seen in action by the future main characters, Harry Lockhart and Harmony Faith Lane, along with Harmony's sister Jenna. Like Dexter, all three kids were fans of the original Johnny Gossamer novels, Jenna was more enamored than most: having been molested by her father from a very age, she longed for an escape. Hoping to make up for her inability to stop the abuse, Harmony told Jenna that she was adopted, and that her real father was Harlan Dexter - unwittingly forming the basis of a lifelong obsession. Once the filming was over, Harlan returned to Hollywood. Over the years, he retired from acting and went into business, eventually becoming the owner of the highly-successful Dexter Clinic, a private mental institute. Unfortunately, his home life was far from harmonious, and his relationship with his daughter Veronica gradually broke down, prompting her to leave for Paris. Ten years later, Harlan's wife died, leaving behind a three million dollar inheritance - which Harlan claimed for himself. Veronica immediately flew back to Hollywood and demanded her share of the money, and when her father refused, took him to court: now being sued for several million dollars more than the original inheritance, Harlan only ended up worsening the feud by calling Veronica a cunt. It was at this point that Harlan took drastic steps to avoid financial ruin. As a fan of mystery novels, he was able to puzzle out a method of ending Veronica's lawsuit without having to part with the money. With the aid of criminal associates, he tracked down a woman by the name of Mia Frye; a twenty-three-year-old from Long Beach, she looked just enough like Veronica to pass in public - and more importantly, withdraw the complaint. Then he had the real Veronica kidnapped and imprisoned at his clinic, where she could be passed off as a mental patient for the rest of her life. With Mia now impersonating Veronica full-time, the situation was settled: the complaint was withdrawn, Harlan was allowed to keep his millions, and "Veronica" claimed to have become a Born-Again Christian in order to explain her change of attitude. On the rare occasions where she had to be seen in public as herself, Mia wore a pink wig so she wouldn't be recognized. Also around this time, Harlan began a sordid private affair with Mia, often having sex with her while she was still disguised as his daughter. Unknown to Harlan and her sister, Jenna Lane decided to act on her obsession around this time: having come to believe that Harlan really was her biological father, she left home for California and began stalking him across Hollywood. The Lady in the Lake By the beginning of the story, Harlan and Mia have been maintaining the ruse for three months. Harlan feels so confident in it that he even hosts a lavish birthday party for her at his mansion, attended not only by success stories like producer Dabney Shaw and private detective-turned-consultant Perry Van Shrike (AKA Gay Perry), but also Harry Lockhart and Harmony Lane, both of whom are trying to make a start on careers in acting. Harry is actually introduced to Harlan at this point, supposedly being groomed by Shaw to become the star of a neo-noir movie, complete with detective lessons from Perry (in reality, he's being used as a bluff to force Colin Farrell into accepting a smaller paycheck to star in the role). He even gets a a look at the impersonator as she prepares to cut the cake, though neither he nor Perry are aware of who she really is. Unknown to all until the end of the film, Jenna manages to sneak onto Harlan's property not long after the party wraps up, hoping to introduce herself to her "father" at long last. She instead finds Harlan having sex with Mia; like the rest of Hollywood, she has no idea that Veronica has been replaced by a lookalike and thus assumes that Harlan is engaged in an incestuous relationship with his own daughter. Heartbroken by the realization that her "real" father is just as bad as her old one, Jenna steals her sister's credit card and uses it to hire Perry's services as a private detective: having learned from her secret visit that Harlan will be with his daughter at a cabin near Big Bear Lake the following evening, she pays Perry for video surveillance of the cabin, believing that he will walk away with enough footage of incest to get Harlan arrested. She then kills herself via gunshot to the head. It is at or around this time that Harlan's apparently foolproof scheme hits an unexpected snag: Veronica's boyfriend is flying in from Paris to celebrate her birthday. Up until now, the ruse has held up perfectly since Veronica had been out of the country for a decade and few had seen her up close following her return; however, Veronica's boyfriend has known her for years during her time in France, and will recognize Mia as a fraud on sight. Realizing that he can no longer continue this masquerade, Harlan has Veronica brought to the cabin at Big Bear Lake the following evening, where she is promptly murdered. As with Jenna's discovery, the truth of what happened remains unknown until the end of the film. However, Perry and Harry are also at the lake - the former on surveillance, the latter taking detective lessons. Though they don't see the murder take place, they do see a car being crashed into the lake with Veronica's body in the trunk: Perry tries to get the body out of the trunk by shooting the lock off, only to end up accidentally shooting the corpse in the head in the process, meaning that they can't report the crime without looking guilty. Thanks to the bullet wound, neither of them recognize Veronica's body. Worse still, the two are seen by Harlan's hired thugs, Mr Frying Pan and Mr Fire, putting them squarely in Harlan Dexter's crosshairs. That same evening, Jenna's suicide is discovered; following some confusion over the identity of the body (as she was wearing Harmony's ID card), she is finally identified, sending Harmony to Harry's hotel room in a state of considerable distress. Under the erroneous impression that Harry is a detective, she believes that the suicide was actually a murder and wants him to help track down her killer, which the firmly-smitten Harry agrees to. Unfortunately, no sooner has he finished placating her, Harry stumbles upon Veronica Dexter's body in his shower. As it turns out, Dexter and his men are now attempting to frame him for the murder, having planted the body and the murder weapon in the hotel and given the police an anonymous tip-off. Fortunately, Harmony is able to delay the police long enough for Harry and Perry to smuggle the corpse out of the building and dispose of it in a dumpster some distance from the hotel. The Little Sister The next day, Harry's attempts to "investigate" Jenna's death and romance Harmony go awry when news reports finally reveal the true identity of the corpse. Realizing that Harry is likely in serious danger, Perry does everything he can to get the thief-turned-actor out of Los Angeles: not only does he admit the extent of the trickery that Dabney had recruited him for, but he also reveals to Harmony that Harry isn't actually a detective. However, while waiting at the airport for the next flight back to New York, Harry learns that Jenna was the one who hired Perry, getting him and Harmony back on the case, though he ends up accidentally losing a finger when Harmony angrily slams a door on it. After getting his finger stitched back on and receiving a powerful dose of painkillers, Harry meets with Perry and Harmony at a party to discuss the case - totally unaware that Dexter's hitmen have tailed them there. Here, Jenna's obsession with Harlan Dexter and Johnny Gossamer comes to light as the three go over their evidence. Once again, Harmony doesn't believe that her sister killed herself, this time operating under assumption that she hired Perry to film evidence of Veronica's murder and that Harlan Dexter killed Jenna to keep her from speaking out. Unfortunately, this leaves them once again being targeted by Harlan: Harry is cornered by Frying Pan and Fire, but as he's the least competent of the group, he manages to get away with a beating - though they do end up breaking the stitches on Harry's finger in the process. Perry, meanwhile, is hired to perform surveillance on a girl wandering MacArthur Park. Unfortunately, the girl is actually Mia Frye (disguised in her pink wig), and she's acting as the bait in an ambush meant for him - the more obvious threat to Dexter's plan. Thankfully, Harmony manages to discover the truth while taking Harry to the hospital (once again doped with painkillers) and races to the park to warn Perry. In the confusion that follows, Harmony manages to save Perry's life, resulting in Mr Frying Pan being shot dead by a fast food vendor. Mia flees the scene by stealing Harmony's car - unaware that Harry is still in the back seat, high on painkillers. Harlan soon realizes that he can't afford to leave the lookalike alive now that she's been privy to an attempted murder, and orders Mr Fire to tie up this loose end. Regaining consciousness at Mia's house, Harry enters just in time to see the pink-wigged girl being murdered by the hitman, and in a state of shock, shoots Mr Fire dead by way of retaliation. The Simple Art Of Murder With no further leads, the ersatz investigation appears to be over and all three main characters are in the process. However, while enjoying some quality time with Harmony, Harry absently recalls that Veronica Dexter wasn't wearing underwear when they found her body, an odd touch considering that she was supposed to be a wholesome born-again Christian. Soon after, Harmony mysteriously vanishes in pursuit of a new lead. Upon hearing of the unexpected clue she was given, Perry has "a fucking conniption" and drives Harry all the way to the Dexter Clinic: as Perry reveals, the patients aren't allowed underwear - finally uncovering the full scope of Harlan's scheme. However, the two assume that Jenna Lane was impersonating Harlan's daughter and was eliminated to tie up loose ends. It's also assumed that Harmony was kidnapped while investigating; in reality she had to give up on the lead for the sake of her day job, having spent the day in a locale with bad mobile reception. On their way out of the clinic, Harry and Perry are caught by an orderly, and though they are able to overwhelm and kill him after a botched attempt at interrogation, this ends up getting the attention of Harlan himself. Accompanied by his henchman Aurelio, the entrepreneur holds the two at gunpoint, and though Perry's phone rings just long enough for Harry to grab it by slight of hand and call for help (impressing Harlan in the process), it at first appears to be a call from a carpet-cleaning company; in reality, the call was from Harmony, and she races to the scene in an attempt to rescue the two. By this time, Harlan is moving to cremate Veronica's body before anyone can notice the difference between her and the lookalike: he has already acquired her corpse (complete with a coffin) and has loaded it into the back of a van so it can be transported to a crematorium that very evening. So, while Aurelio tortures Harry and Perry for information on anyone else they told about the case, Harlan orders his men to get the body to the crematorium, trusting that Aurelio will eliminate the detectives once he's finished interrogating them. Just as the henchmen are debating on who should drive the van, Harmony arrives on the scene and steals it, forcing Harlan and his goons to give chase. Meanwhile, Aurelio's torture session goes awry when Perry targets his homophobia, taunting him until he loses composure and tries to attack him head-on - only to get shot with a derringer Perry was hiding in the crotch of his pants ("homophobes never check there"). Escaping, the pair join the pursuit. Harmony is eventually driven off the road, crashing the van into the railing of an overpass, and in the process, the coffin is ejected from the rear doors and gets stuck on a sign on the edge of the overpass - Veronica's hand flopping out of the open lid for good measure. Harmony is knocked unconscious during her escape down an embankment, Perry is shot in a gunfight with Harlan's men, and though Harry is wounded by a stray bullet fired through Perry, he is able to recover just long enough to upright himself. Harlan himself then tries to run Harry over, forcing him to leap over the edge of the overpass, just managing to grab Veronica's hand and save himself from falling into oncoming traffic. With his gun stuck on the other end of the coffin and Harlan moving towards the railing to finish him off, Harry appears to be out of luck; however, he is able to budge the handgun from its perch and catch it in mid-fall - just in time to shoot Harlan in the chest. "Captain Fuckin' Magic!" a surprised Harlan Dexter remarks, and collapses out of shot, dead. Trivia * The Johnny Gossamer film shown is actually footage from the 1987 film Dead Aim, in which Corbin Bersen had a role. Category:Live Action Villains Category:Businessmen Category:Parents Category:Gaolers Category:Control Freaks Category:Greedy Category:Abusers Category:Faux Affably Evil Category:Comedy Villains Category:Perverts